Saying 'no' can make you happier and healthier. Here are 5 steps to do it. -
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Saying ‘no’ can make you happier and healthier. Here are 5 steps to do it.

Saying ‘no’ can make you happier and healthier. Here are 5 steps to do it.

Kristen is a young woman that was a real go-getter. She didn’t fear saying “yes” to almost anything. Do you know what happened to her life all because of this good habit?

Her career became successful

She wasn’t afraid to try new things or risk failure. So the blogger and knitting enthusiast found herself with her own office at the young age of 21. But her love affair with the word “yes” didn’t last forever.

30 years later, she found that her romance with “yes” had finally lost its flame. She was stressed out.

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Sure, saying “yes” can do wonders but saying “yes” to the wrong things — that’s different.

She found herself saying “yes” to the wrong things, leaving her stretched and overcommitted.

So she decided it was time give a word in her lexicon some extra use.

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It took a while, but once she perfected “the art of ‘no'” she knew she made the right decision.

In a blog post about her journey to learning how to say no, she says getting into the habit wasn’t easy, but it was so worth it. She feels better: free, happy, and more helpful!

Here are some simple tips that’ll have you saying that two-letter word with ease in no time:

1. Learn the True Reason Why You Need to Say No

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Image Source: “Scandal”

It’ll be easier to stick to saying “no” when you’ve sat down and told yourself why you’ve made the conscious decision to do so.

Why do you need to say “no”? Is it to get more sleep? To be less stressed? To have more time to go to the gym or spend time with friends? Remember that every reason is valid. Just make sure you discover yours.

2. Everyone Won’t Hate You When You Keep Saying “No”

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Image Source: “Skins”

People get that we have limitations — because we all have them. And, you know, there’s that thing with sleeping and eating that we humans can’t do without.

If people respect you enough to ask for your help, they’ll respect you enough to not take your “no” personally. Keep in mind that it isn’t the word “no” that’s inherently rude; it’s how it’s said that makes the difference.

3. Overcome FOMO and Get Comfortable With “Doing You”

The temptation to say “yes” can be especially strong when you feel like you don’t want to miss out on a great opportunity. If you’re tempted to say “yes” out of fear, ask yourself a few questions.

Will there be other parties? Can I really take on another commitment? Will I feel energized or more exhausted if I do this?

4. Two New Magic Words: “And” and “But”

We know what you’re thinking… “no” may seem rude at some times. Making it really hard to say no on special cases. Nobody likes to be rude, right? Try these simple additions to help you soften the blow while still sounding confident:

When you’re just flat out saying “no.”
“Yes, I’d love to participate, and I am going to have to decline.”

When you know someone who can do it.
“I love that you thought of me, and I’m unable to participate. How can I help you find someone else?”
When you want to show your appreciation for the ask.
“I think your idea is fabulous, and I’m not able to participate at this time.”

When it’s “no” — for now.
“Yes, I’d love to participate, but at a later date. Can you ask me again in January?”

5. Keep It Short and Sweet

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Image Source: “30 Rock”

Know that saying “no” is enough. You don’t need to provide a long explanation to prove the worth of your “no.” Keep it simple while being truthful. It’ll be clear, and (bonus points) you don’t sound like you’re making up excuses!

And if you wish you didn’t have to say “no”? Here’s another example Gates offers:

I really wanted to attend your party but I was working late and the kids had a meltdown when I came home and by the time things were calmed down it was too late. Besides, someone boxed me in and I couldn’t get out of my parking space even if I wanted to. I’m sorry if you were counting on me. How can I make it up to you?

With these, you can use “no” to make your life happier and better today. What do you think about this idea? Do you support saying no? Share your thoughts in the comments below!